the case of the controversial PRF

it's been fun perhaps by a few, to those who have read this blog over and over only to realize in the end that it had made a greater effect, to many and or to a certain individual, by which i myself didn't came to realize until today. to make the long story short, i messed up pretty badly here.

i knew that by re-writing this blog together with the title would mean my career so to speak. but i'd rather re-write it and fix this whole thing from ground zero.

i could have easily deleted the whole stuff and forget about this being written here. i could have just shut up and believe that it's just a piece of blog - written way back in 2007 and forget about it existed.

but no, i have ruined so many things by writing those. to a certain point that a lot of people, some are distant and some are close to me, are/were affected. from the way they think to the way they do things...and i couldn't accept that. i had been so much childish, so immature, so selfish to think that the only way i can release bad feelings about a certain incident is through 'blogging' it. and when i'm done...just when i think i'm done and ready to face a challenge again at work, i simply have stepped on others' shoe. no, a lot of shoes to be exact.

but hear me out just for a sec.

i feel so bad about hurting a lot of great people at my workplace.

and i am, in all honesty, saying sorry to everybody who got affected by this mess i have created. i could have been patient enough to understand that all things will happen at the right time, at the right moment and there is no way i could have made people decide immediately to a certain issue. i truly understand now that there are things, few to many, especially at work where i don't have the right to question or to mock someone just because i wanted to get things done my way. impatience led me to this point to where i have hurt the people i treasure and look up to.

the wound that i have inflicted to them has not been healed, i believe up to this point in time. but i do believe in second chances. i do believe in healing. and i do believe in forgiveness just as it is being written in the Holy Scriptures.

these, perhaps, are the most important lessons i have learned all through out my 10-years of existence in this company - patience, that all things happen for a reason and that it happens at the right time and not my own. and most of all, humility, to accept whatever consequence that will be given to me for the mistakes i have made.

i may not be able to regain back your trust and confidence in me, but i hope you will allow me to, once again, rebuild it.

i am truly and deeply sorry...